To parent only one.

I guess I never really realized what life with 3 kids aged 3 and under really means. Jer and I took Victoria to an amusement park last night. He got some free tickets so all we had to do was drive down there and my mom babysat the other two because it was gonna be a late night. So we got there and we were halfway across the parking lot before I realized that already, it was easier. No stroller. No unbuckling 3 seats. No "Wait for me" "I want out first" "It's my turn to lock the car" "This is MY side of the stroller" "I want my cup" "I lost my shoe" "Did you get the bag" "No I don't have the bag I asked you if...go back... I'll wait here." I was holding Jeremy's hand instead of 2 sets of little hands or a stroller. We got to walk through the turnstile instead of the gate because we had no stroller. The stroller was a big one. Didn't have to park the stroller anywhere. Didn't have to make sure not to hit anyone with the stroller. Didn't have to try to figure out how to get the stroller through the mini-golf course. No diaper bag, no formula, no crying. Did I mention I got to hold Jeremy's hand? the. whole. day. NO DIAPERS. We haven't had an outing with no diapers since before Victoria was BORN. THREE years! We all sat having dinner and we all ate, at the same time, at a leisurely pace. I mean we did still have typical outing behavior like a spilt drink and someone little jumped in the little river to get her golf ball, but it wasn't that big of a deal. We bought ONE drink and it was enough to share. We bought ONE trinket and didn't have to worry about a fight. We were able to do the same ride over and over because we didn't have someone getting bored. But at some point my happy-go-lucky-gosh-this-is-so-easy attitude began to shift. I started to feel real uneasy. Anytime we left ANYWHERE I felt like I was missing something. Walking around carrying wet socks was odd... normally those would've been thrown right in the diaperbag. Wait the diaperbag, where's Nate, I'm sure he needs changed... oh wait. Right. He's not here. I was missing someone. And it was quiet. Too quiet. Normally when we go out as a family we get noticed. Naturally we're louder, we take up a bit more space, people notice strollers and then they see the 2 small children hanging onto the stroller and I can literally watch people's eyes go from kid to kid and then to me while thinking "are they all hers" or "I could never do that" etc etc. We didn't get that last night. We were... normal? It was weird. At one point I was strapping Victoria in a ride and she looked sad and I asked her what was wrong and she says to me "I wish Nate was here. He loves the trains."
I was glad to have the time alone with Victoria. A glimpse into a life I'll never have. But I couldn't get home quick enough. This morning was business as usual. Round of diapers, a few breakfasts, a couple sippies and a bottle. Rotation from child to child meeting their needs and forgetting mine. Getting them dressed and redressed. Helping them go potty and change another round of diapers. Naptimes, timeouts, tv, storytime, snacktime, another timeout for something. Three rounds of kisses. twice as many hugs. Sharing and conspiring. Rushing to me for every acheivement and boo-boo... all those important things that make me answer that "How do you do it?" question I get so often with a simple smile and confident "It's really not that hard."
So I've decided. Having 1 kid might be easier. But having 3 is much more my speed. Something I would never change. Not in a million years. Something I know I do well and feels so right. And maybe we'll make a point to have some more one on one time in the future but it's nice to know I'm not living with any regrets.

Shoes, shoes and more shoes

OK shoes have always been my weakness... when Jer and I moved to VA for the Navy the first time I had 63 pairs and I claimed to "wear them all!" Seriously my weakness. So after a few pgs and more than a few pounds my feet are 2 sizes up from highschool and I've been avoiding shoes the best I can because, well, slippery slope. A window display caught my eye at the mall yesterday and it literally froze me in my tracks. I was like "Oooh Victoria, looooooooooook." So we stood there admiring the shoes for a minute or two before prying ourselves away so we could move on to the task at hand. After completeling what we were in the mall to do we had to pass the beautiful window display again and Victoria pipes up "Mommy let's go in!" So of course I have to and before I know it, I'm trying on shoes. Gorgeous, beautiful, fantastic holiday heels. I'm in love. Victoria is on the floor oohing and ahhing with me. It's like walking on clouds. I forgot how good a nice pair of shoes felt on your feet. But I decline, muttering something about payday and needing to ask Jeremy before I spent that kind of money and the sales lady perks up and begins to tell me about this sale. This wonderful buy one pair get the next pair for $10. Any pair. Holy crap. Victoria and I beeline to the car where Jer is waiting (sleeping) with the other two (also sleeping) and I wake him and beg him for shoes. I can get anything when the man is drowsy so after he agrees without much fight Victoria and I rush back in to get my shoes! OMG they are even more perfect the 2nd time I try them on! The sales woman then says "so go pick out your second pair and these will be at the register for you." omg I get a 2nd pair! I completely forgot! So I head to the wall and start looking at shoes when I start to hear muffled laughter around me. I look around to see what's funny and see Victoria a few feet over from me. She is picking up a shoe, examing the top, the front, the side, flips it over for a quick second, ruffles her nose up and puts the shoes down. Then she does it with the next shoe and the next one. The sales lady comes to ask me if I've found one I want to try on yet and VICTORIA says, "I like this one. I'm a 11 please" and she hands the lady a rather cute purple peektoe stiletto (sizing was accurate by the way). The crowd roared. The woman stood there for a moment, holding her composure best she can and she says to Victoria, "I'm sorry miss, we don't carry those that small." and Victoria, in as grown up a manner as I've ever seen from her replies "Oh that's ok, I'll keep looking." and resumes her browsing.

omg I've created a monster!

The revolving door of the doctor's office

So at first I was kind of excited about going to the pediatrician, he is young, kinda cute, really nice, GREAT with the kids. I was slightly afraid I'd never learn his name though. I mean heck, I still have the old pedi's name written on the side of my fridge because I couldn't remember that! It's not like I go to the Dr that often anyway. Well, that used to be the case. I feel like I've seen more of Dr. G in the last few weeks than I've seen my husband! I guess it all started with Victoria's arm...

((( insert hazy dream sequence here )))

Victoria fell and we rushed her off to Urgent Care. The next day we were in seeing Dr. G because it wasn't getting better. Before we even got to see him though we got to run around the hospital taking and then tracking down x-rays. We finally manage to get some face time with our then nameless Dr except I'm totally exhausted and barely able to hold a conversation so learning his name wasn't exactly a priority. A week later we were in the Bone and Joint clinic seeing another doctor getting a cast. Just a few short days later I've got Evie in the Vision Clinic checking out her eyes. Any idea how difficult it is to try to dilate a tired baby's eyes? Yeah, well count yourself lucky if you don't. I do and lemme tell you - not fun. Three little days after that we are back with Dr G, this time Evie in to. We have a very successful well baby check up. Learned a little about the man, held up a decent conversation about the baby. That's probably the point that his name started to stick. But it doesn't stop there. Not but a handful of hours pass before I have to take Nate in to be seen for some little boy issues. Dr. G wasn't in that day so we saw the on-call and she was nice enough, but not nearly as cute. I most definitely prefer Dr. G-man. Finally today we return to the lovely office to try to find another solution to Nate's little boy problems and since we were his last patient of the day Dr. G was chatty. Such a nice man. It's too bad I am really sick of seeing him. I don't want to go back to his office again until December when Evie has another well-baby checkup. I officially used all the money that was generously given to me specifically for Dr visits. Betcha the man who gave me that didn't expect me to use it all in 3 days time huh?

Please let this be the end of the revolving door at the doctors... I'm so tired of going round and round. He could just come live next door to me and save me the $35 co-pay each time. I told him today he was starting to be an expensive conversationalist. At least he laughed a little. You see he's only been working in this practice since mid-August. He called me by first name today. That's a tell-tale sign of seeing a bit too much of him don't you think?

I hate teeth!

Ok, well I don't hate ALL teeth -- they are really pretty handy, ya know, for eating, but I do hate MY teeth. Stupid crooked weak ugly teeth. Went to see Dr. Cash the orthodontist again today. This time after waiting only 10 minutes (as opposed to the normal 15-20) I was ushered back to a little side room by a long-haired hygienist. I was thinking, "Hey this might be okay, she's good enough to get her very own room!!"

Yeah. I was mistaken. They put her in that little room because they got tired of hearing about her boyfriend... and how he stopped being her boyfriend so he could date a newer younger model of herself who had more freedom and would drop everything to go out of town on a Thursday, which obviously she can't do and it would've been nice if he had told her that he wasn't her boyfriend anymore because she was still under the impression that they were dating and she ran into them at the Nature Center.... and yeah, so they build her a tiny odd shaped prison to save themselves from the insanity that would surely follow listening to that every day. I could be wrong, but I don't think I am.

My thinking that she was the best so she got a special room was also ripped to shreds when she started in on me. Oh.My.God. I mean come on! If you don't know what you're doing, don't just have at it anyway!! I don't know how long into the appt - 5 minutes probably (although it felt like 20) she stops and says, "Ohhhhh you have THOSE kind of braces, no wonder this wasn't working." Yeah. Mhmm. Right. So she figures out what she needs to do but still doesn't have any finesse getting the job done. So she pulls and prods and finally gets a new wire in. Dr. Cash comes in and together they decide that they are going to try to close a gap that was created by pulling one of my teeth a year ago. They put this chain looking thing on top of my braces. Let's just say I hope that's temporary.

Then they start in on my gums. Yes, I know they are not healthy. Yes, I know I need to me more aggressive taking care of them. Yes I'm seeing my dentist like I should. Yes, it's one of those things that started when I was pregnant for umpteen years consecutively. No I do no need you to talk to me like I'm a 3 year old and don't know how to brush my teeth. How many moms do you know that have put themselves on the top of their "to do" list. I do the best I can.

Normally the headaches and pain from an adjustment kick in a couple hours after the appt and trail off a couple hours after that. I was hurting before I left the office. I really hope the Advil feels like kicking in soon, I took it an hour ago... I don't think it will.

I have a year left. This better be worth it.

WOO!! Let's hope this continues!

Yeah that's right! WOO! My day so far:

Got Victoria to school ON TIME with all 3 kids in tow. Jer took overtime so I was totally on my own this morning. Everyone was dressed, hair and teeth brushed, fed, socks AND shoes on (last Tuesday for pickup Nate didn't have shoes on).

Anyway we got there and everything went very smoothing. ALL of us went in, no tears when Nate, Evie and I went to leave. I got to talk to the principal, the SCRIP coordinator - I had some questions, said hi to a few moms on my way out -- all stuff I'm normally too self-conscious to do. Then we went to the Library! Nate's first time!! We got a train book. Then we went to the grocery store to pick up a few things. Came home had round 2 of breakfast (I didn't eat the first time) and then Evie went to nap and Nate went out to play. It's now 10:20 and I JUST turned the TV and computer on and OMIGOSH it feels GOOOOOOOD. Normally electronics are on first thing.

I think I am gonna get used to this preschool thing just fine :)

Good Grief Preschool is hard!

Today was Victoria's first day sans mama. I was actually really excited for her, but judging from our morning lemme just tell you that we are going to be late, possibly a lot. This child does not want to eat in the morning! Anyway... so we are the first ones in her class there so we go in and drop her bag and get her lamb name tag on the board (we call it checking in with the Shepard everyday) and a quick kiss and off I went. I had to go to Walgreen's after drop-off so I'm driving and driving and totally immersed in keeping myself composed and not crying and all of a sudden I realize that I'm 2 blocks past Walgreen's. Yeah. So I make my U-turn and eventually make it home. Nathan and I had a great time hanging out together, until he got bored and wanted to play outside with Tor... He missed her. The last 30 minutes before pickup seemed like an eternity!! But we made it through with a snack and some Tom and Jerry and set out to get our sissy!

Carline leaves some to be desired, but I'm sure the kinks will get worked out sooner than later. Victoria came to the car all smiles and joyful, and silent. All I've been able to pull from her is that she had breakfast for snack - they had cereal and they went outside to play and Ms. Mary has TWO slides, and she did good! We get home and continued our Tom and Jerry fest and I start to go through her mailbag - lots of info for mama. Lots of volunteer positions too.... Then the most difficult part happened. Dory. "Hey mom look what I have!" As she pulls out (the most annoying) Dory toy from her bag her face lights up and she excitedly shows Nathan her new toy. It hits me like a brick wall. Why does she have this toy. She who thinks the entire world belongs to her. I ask her about the circumstances for getting the toy and all I get is "Ms Mary told me to wait. I wanted it." So I put in a call to Ms. Mary. I fret. I worry and get anxious and try to decide how I'm going to explain to my 3 year old that stealing is not acceptable and we have to take her new toy back to Ms. Mary and apologize... and... and... and... and the phone rings. It's Ms. Mary. I ask her about the toy and she says to me, "oh yes! Victoria got that out of the treasure bin today for being polite! I'm so glad you called because things happen sometimes but don't worry, she was wonderful today." What a sigh of relief!! My good girl!! This parenting thing is hard when you aren't around them all day long!!!

GADs Aggh!

So little Miss Evie has outgrown another size in her diapers. That took all of what? 8 minutes? So we are moving on up to larges! I have most of her stash already, beautiful GADs (greenacredesigns.com) but I am longing for another. A special one with Embroidery!! I already have it picked out and everything if I can just sell some of her mediums maybe I can get it! In fact, I have a wonderful mommy friend who is running a contest on her blog and is giving away a few giftcards! Go visit her blog at http://www.ohanamamablog.blogspot.com/ and check out http://www.greenacredesigns.com/ to see the best diapers in the world!!!

Victoria's First day at Preschool

Well, the day has finally come for my oldest to head off to school. Two days a week from 8:15-11:15a she will be learning with Ms. Mary. Today was interesting to say the least. It was parent orientation day or something. What was suppose to end at 10 didn't end until 11:20, and aside from having some sitter issues at home it wasn't too stressful. You see we got this letter YESTERDAY telling us that it was parent day instead of just a regular attendance day for the kids. Yeah, Parent day. So I had to scramble to find a sitter for Nate and Evie because let's face it, they weren't gonna handle being at preschool very well. Ordinarily that'd be alright, but you see Jeremy had overtime this morning (and tomorrow, and Saturday and Monday) and quite frankly, we need it. So my grandmother takes off work to be with the rugrats and off Tor and I go. There's a certain amount of chaos that is expected for a first day, but omg. You know I will never seek the job of preschool teacher. Ever. Things were moving pretty slowly and Victoria was getting bored, but the overall impression was good. She loves her teacher and her friends. I love that she's in a brand new Catholic school and that in a 3 hour time frame they pray no less than 4 times. Here's looking forward to drop-off on Tuesday!!

Who am I you ask?

My name is Laura. I'm a Mommy. That pretty much sums it up!

Well okay, I'll tell you a little more.

I'm crazy - or so I've been told. I stay home to raise my 3 young children. They are close in age (hence the craziness) Victoria is 13 months - well, 12 months, 29 days, 3 hours - older than Nathan, who is roughly 20 months older than Evelyn. You see how that works? You lose a little bit of your mind with each kid! Jeremy is my husband and has graciously lent me his Google email account for this blog, mainly because I didn't want the upkeep of a second account. Anyway he works hard at bringing in the money by working the overnight shift, keeping me happy as my husband and trying to keep up with all three kids. I'm not sure what he'd say is the hardest of those, probably me. You'll have to ask him someday. We've been married for 4 1/2 years now... I'm sure you'll see some posts on that later.

I lived most of my life surrounded by people who didn't value the truth and grew up believing that it wasn't really important. As I've grown I've learned that I don't agree with that life philosophy at all. So I am going to do my best to tell the truth. My dad will tell you I've always had a problem with tact... well yeah maybe as a child I did, but now I just tell the truth wherever I deem it's needed. I'm not good at sugar coating things. I don't like it when people do it to me and I think beating around something potentially hurtful is a waste of time and in the end causes more damage than the truth said with genuine care and respect. You ask me a question, you are going to get the truth. All of it. Of course I'm not some terrible person out to harm others so instead of causing conflict where it's not welcome, I back out of conversations a lot. So if you see me vanish from something you can pretty much figure it's one of two things: a) I'm busy with a baby, or 2)I'm holding my tongue. Ahhh.... I've been watching Paul on Mad About You too much... a) and 2) ha ha. Gotta love reruns....

Biting the Blogging Bullet.

Time to dive in and Just do it! That's what I tell people all the time. If there's something you want, just do it. Worst thing that can happen is you don't like it and decide to spend your time another way! So I'm taking my own advice! Here's my blog!!!